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I am Salty The Beast. I am what you might call a Renaissance man, meaning I find interest in most every medium. I love watching movies, listening to music, writing music, playing video games, making videos, etc.

Monday, July 16, 2012

BRÜTAL SØNG OF THE WEEK: July 16th, 2012


Brütal Søng: “Trogdor”
Artist: Strong Bad
Album: Strong Bad Sings (And Other Type Hits)


Can we just establish right here and right now that if you don’t know about homestarrunner.com, the Flash-animated web cartoons Strong Bad Emails and Teen Girl Squad, or the Burninator himself, you officially lived under a cyber-stone for the majority of the 00s? For anyone reading this who hasn’t yet “witnessed the whiteness,” please do yourself a favor and leave my blog. No, I mean it. Leave my blog and type the website into your little searchy-search thing and click on a toon or two. I’ll wait for you to get back. I promise.


So anydangway, Homestar Runner ate up all my time as a kid, from the time I was in elementary school all the way until the start of high school. It all started when my older sister introduced me to Teen Girl Squad, which featured four stereotypical teenaged girls (“Cheerleader! So-and-so! What’s Her Face! The Ugly One!,” as they’re called) that were highly prone to…well, the most gruesome deaths that crude, stick-figure animation had to offer. My warped nine-year-old mind loved it! But I continued to explore the site, and I gradually discovered this strange universe created by Mike and Matt Chapman (or the Brothers Chaps, the website runners) and inhabited by characters like Homestar Runner, Strong Bad, Coach Z, and everybody’s favorite, The Cheat. Meh!

I owe an enormous debt of gratitude to these Chapman fellows, for their offbeat comedy greatly shaped the sense of humor I have today. The best way I can describe it is like dry absurdist wit paired with a geeky admiration for gaming culture, musical trends, and kitschy-cool television. I’ve stolen countless quotes from these cartoons and have applied them to my vernacular, even repurposing a few lines of dialogue into daily idioms. And whenever somebody catches the reference, I always get in a great big geek-out discussion about the good ol’ days. Oh, how I wish the site would start pumping out new material again. I could really use it now.

So enough rambling. The point is, if you don’t know about Trogdor…here’s all you need to know in one video.


Trogdor is an S-shaped dragon with exactly one beefy arm and an affinity for burninating, which one can only assume is a mashup of ‘burning’ and ‘exterminating.’ Perfect fodder for a Brütal Søng, right? And to be sure, the rough cut of the song in the cartoon was already cool. But when the guys started selling a compilation album on the site titled Strong Bad Sings, that’s when fans were treated to an even better version: a blazing heavy metal tune with a face melting dual guitar solo and outrageous falsettos. This was certainly one to blast your speakers to. So awesome was this jam that I actually recorded a full cover version back in 8th grade…not that you’ll ever hear it (my voice sounds incredibly stupid). I just thought you should know…yeah. So “Trogdor,” a song for the ages. BECAUSE IT’S MIDNIGHT!

And for those who champion that…other dragon Strong Bad drew on that fateful day, here’s your anthem.


- STB

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